“You don’t actually think about the mechanics of death and dying, and what happens around you during that time until you have to face it yourself. Then, all of a sudden you think, ‘How will I do that?’ and ‘What does this mean?’ Then hospice was there. They stepped in and helped, and it has just been brilliant.”
For Keryn and Peter, life has been an adventure. They met later in life and have spent 26 years enjoying each other’s company and creating a relationship full of love and laughter. For 15 years they travelled the world, creating memories they will cherish for life. “We didn’t leave any stone unturned,” Keryn says. They learned ballroom dancing, made lifelong friends, and even moved to Australia to become cheesemakers in their sixties. “We worked for a while, but it was too demanding, so we came back to New Zealand. Then Peter found art, and now painting is his happy place.”
Three years ago, everything changed. Keryn’s persistent health issues turned out to be colorectal cancer. “I had irritable bowel syndrome for years, so the symptoms were masked,” she explains. “By the time they found the tumour, it was stage three. Then they discovered it had spread to my lungs, and it was actually stage four.”
Despite the devastating news, Keryn and Peter faced it together. “This is our cancer journey, not just mine,” Keryn says. “We do this together.” Peter has been by her side every step of the way – managing medications, attending every appointment, and offering constant support.
However, as the illness progressed, the weight of it became overwhelming. Keryn endured 32 rounds of chemotherapy over the course of 18 months. “Then I said stop, I can’t take it anymore. I wanted quality over quantity.” It was a difficult decision, but one they made together. “We talked to our oncologist who had been telling us for a while that we needed to think about where we were going, and what our priorities were.”
After stopping chemo, other health complications arose. Keryn’s pain increased significantly, she suffered a heart attack, and was diagnosed with polymyalgia, with severe pain in her hip.
“That’s when we reached a crisis point,” Peter says. “Chronic pain took over. It was unbearable for Keryn, and we just couldn’t manage it anymore. We were then referred to Waipuna Hospice, and it has been a life saver.”
“People assume hospice care is just for the end of days,” Peter says. “But there’s a whole heap more to it than that.”
Waipuna Hospice provided the expert support they so desperately needed. They offered pain management, counselling, physiotherapy, and practical help, easing the burden on both Keryn and Peter. “Hospice has saved us several times when we’ve been facing situations we couldn’t handle on our own,” Keryn says. “We have been so grateful.”
This care is only possible because of the support from people like you.
When Keryn’s pain became unbearable, hospice nurses worked to adjust her medications, ensuring she was comfortable. When Peter felt overwhelmed, he was able to access counselling. When Keryn struggled to move, a hospice physio visited their home and recommended adjustments, including a reclining chair. “The next day Waipuna Hospice had arranged for one of their Lazy-boy chairs to be delivered and installed,” Peter recalls. “It was just amazing.”
The hospice team was also there when things became too much at home. “There was a period where the pain medication got out of balance, and I had a complete physical and emotional breakdown,” Keryn says. “I ended up staying in the hospice Inpatient Unit for 10 days. It was incredible. The level of care and support helped so much.”
Peter agrees. “There was a time when Keryn was in such extreme pain, and we had both reached our wits’ end and didn’t know what to do. But with hospice we had support. Even in the middle of the night, we could call, and someone would be there to guide us – it truly was a lifesaver. Without hospice, I don’t know where we would have ended up.”
Caring for Keryn became a full-time responsibility for Peter, and he felt the immense pressure of managing her medications, mobility issues, and supporting her emotionally. “At times, I didn’t know how I would cope.” But with Waipuna Hospice by their side, he never felt alone. “It certainly always felt that Keryn was the prime focus during our care, but there has always been attention on me as well,” Peter says. “Not only with the counselling, but just in general. I’ve felt very supported by hospice the entire way.”
Will you help ensure more people like Keryn and Peter receive this essential care?
Your support means that Waipuna Hospice can be there in moments of crisis, providing comfort and relief. It means people like Keryn and Peter won’t have to face their hardest days alone.
“We have experienced the full spectrum of hospice’s services,” Keryn says. “From nursing and doctor visits to equipment, physio, and even a stay in the Inpatient Unit. We call it their wrap-around care because it has just been so encompassing.”
“Hospice is critical for our community,” Peter adds. “It provides care in a way the public health system just can’t. It’s filling a very large gap, and it can’t run without public support.”
Now, Keryn and Peter are focusing on the time they have together. “We don’t plan too far ahead,” Peter says. “We just keep trundling on until something tells us we shouldn’t.”
Keryn smiles. “Cancer is greedy, it takes all my energy and leaves me with the leftovers, but I am making the most of it. It’s better to smile than frown. I truly believe there is always a brighter side, and that’s what I like to focus on.”
“The last three years have been extremely difficult,” Keryn reflects. “But we still have each other. I’m doing better thanks to hospice’s support, and I have been lucky enough to spend some wonderful moments with my friends and family.”
“We know death is going to happen at some stage,” Peter adds. “But it isn’t happening yet. And when it does, we’ll deal with it knowing that we’ve made the most of the time we had together.”
We want to say a huge thank you to Keryn and Peter for sharing their story with us.
Please make a donation today. Your generosity ensures Waipuna Hospice can continue providing wrap-around compassionate care to those in our community who need it most