Story: Not the End, But a New Chapter

When we met Betsy Pavitte, one of the first things she told us was, “I’m horribly dyslexic. I was fired from every job I had.” She says it with a matter-of-fact smile and a quick laugh, not out of bitterness, but with the humour and honesty that have shaped her extraordinary life.

She’s been a businesswoman, a mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother, a pianist, a photographer, and even a surprise guest at her own birth mother’s table after tracking her down at age 47.

But nothing quite prepared her for what came in December last year.

“I went to bed and couldn’t get comfortable. By midnight, I was in pain,” Betsy recalled. A hospital admission revealed far more than just a kidney stone. “They found a three-centimetre mass and gave me two to three months to live.” That was the beginning of her journey with hospice, a journey that initially frightened her.

“I was a complete mess when they first arrived, and I wasn’t coping well, so hospice suggested I spend some time in their Inpatient Unit to manage my symptoms. When I got there, I was expecting it to have 30 beds, but there were just six. They explained that the majority of their care happens in people’s homes, and patients often come into the unit for a brief period before going home again. It was a relief to hear.”

At that point, Betsy was struggling.

“My medications were a mess, I was in a lot of pain, and I felt like I didn’t have much control over my body, but the nurses and doctors sorted everything. It was amazing. I’d never felt so well looked after.”

After six days in the unit, her symptoms were stabilised, and Betsy was able to return home. However, Waipuna’s care continued.

“They were coming three times a week at first, as that’s what I needed. Now they call me once a week to check in and visit when it’s required. Sometimes they don’t need to come, and sometimes they do, and that feels right. They have adapted their care to suit me.”

It’s not just the practical support that has mattered to Betsy. “They brought out this book, a planning book. At first, I couldn’t connect with it,” she admitted. “But one day, I picked it up and I wrote: ‘I want to be free.’ That was a big moment. Since then, I have been filling it out and making sure I think about what comes next, and what I might want my life, and death, to look like.”

Being able to stay at home has meant a lot to her. “I had no idea hospice cared for people at home. With Waipuna Hospice’s support, I have been able to return to a fairly normal life, which, if you had asked back in December, I never would have thought was possible.”

Betsy says she appreciates the responsiveness too. “One evening, my blood sugars were 20. I rang the hospice and they gave me the advice I needed. They seem to know everything and are always there to help.”

Betsy also experienced what it means to be truly advocated for. When she struggled to get an urgent doctor’s appointment, she mentioned it to one of the hospice team. “I told my hospice nurse, and I know she rang the doctor because I got a message that afternoon saying the doctor would see me. That was such a blessing.”

Today, at 85, Betsy is pragmatic about the future. “The final stage has never worried me. At some point, you’re going to kick the bucket. That’s just a fact of life.”

“And to be honest,” she adds with a smile, “with hospice’s help I’ve been able to live a relatively normal life, almost to the point where I forget I have cancer. I’m very lucky to have them by my side.”